When it comes to improving your sex life, most advice centers on lighting candles in the bedroom, taking warm baths, and playing soft music. These things are not commonly associated with sexuality, so the thrill in the bedroom they are supposed to evoke is often lost. While they are each supposed to bring about feelings of sensuality and sexuality, they often simply make us feel as though we want to sleep rather than get busy in the bedroom.

When a couple reaches the point where they are looking for more thrills in the bedroom, they are often far enough into the relationship to take some very definite turns but may not understand how to do just that. Thrills in the bedroom may not be natural and couples need to take the time to understand needs, wants, desires and the process to make these a reality when the time is right. 

Communication and bedroom thrills

The first line of defense against sexual boredom is communication. Often couples get into a groove in a relationship, even in the bedroom, and that groove becomes commonplace. When sex is commonplace, the thrill can soon leave and the time between lovemaking sessions can grow longer and longer. This is the turning point where communication can help.

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Communicating with your partner about sexual experiences you would like to try, or bedroom activities that are now boring, is the perfect way to step out of the normal and into excitement again.

Predictable or novel?

Another thrill in the bedroom can be found by discovering what type of person you are sexually. If you love the predictable, things can be a bit more difficult to spice up in the bedroom. However, if the novel is more your speed, things can get thrilling very fast.

Novelty in the bedroom is the perfect solution to sexual boredom. Novel choices can include taking to the bar and “picking up” your partner, or dressing up for a bit of bedroom play. Sex toys and movies are also novel choices to spice up bedroom activities.

Too much togetherness?

When a couple spends too much time together, the result can be a waning of sexual desire. Intimacy requires time apart and often couples think the opposite. For example, when a person has been working all day and they walk into a restaurant, they may smell something that immediately makes their mouth water. This reaction is subconscious. Now, if that same smell was present all day, even if hunger was felt, the food would not be as appealing and the subconscious reaction would not occur.

The same goes for time spent together. When a couple spends time apart, they often build desire subconsciously. When they first see each other in the evening, after a long day at work, there is an immediate reaction that can be used to spark intimacy and eventually lovemaking.